Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Packer: 'It slipped'

INDIANAPOLIS -- Billy Packer is a bit delusional, The Big Picture has learned. During Sunday's Tournament Selection Show on CBS, Packer made some odd comments when discussing his initial thoughts about the brackets. He called out the Wisconsin-Arizona pairing before it was unveiled to the world.

"I just blew it," Packer told sources. "I don't know what got into me. Yeah I was a little buzzed, but it's not like I was trippin' on shrooms."

Added broadcast teammate Jim Nantz, "I've never seen him like this, and we've done some wild shit together. Sure Billy put some of 'Grandpa's Old Cough Medicine' in his beverage, but Billy calls most games pretty loaded."

Nantz and Packer were calling the Big Ten Championship Game from Conseco Field House. The 'Cough Medicine' Nantz referred to was actually Jim Beam.

"I just jumped the gun," said Packer, short and bald. "I don't usually do that. Well, except in the bedroom, but Cialis is helping with that."

Packer also interrogated Selection Committee Chairman, Craig Littlepage, Sunday about questionable seeding and certain bubble teams being left out of the tournament.

"He's a fucker," said Packer. "Put me in that committee room, put me on deadline, give me some speed and, dammit, I'd get it done."

While it is unclear at this time if Packer is on medication for his height problem, some speculate that Packer is taking the Cream and the Clear to bulk up.

As for his comments, "He just let it go," said Nantz. "I don't think he'll get fired (for the comments) but if word gets out about his excessive drinking, that may be the last straw."

Norv Turner Update: It's been a while, but reports early Tuesday morning say our homeboy Norv Turner is still in as offensive coordinator of the 49ers.

In other news: Redskins' owner Daniel Snyder continued his spending spree by signing WR Antwaan Randel El and by building hotels on Park Place and the Boardwalk.

1 comment:

insomniac said...

The Snyder building hotels remark is one of those "I wish I thought of that" comments.

Thx for getting back to me re: the NCAA tix...looks like I'm going to have to start donating plasma while bidding on ebay...