Gob Bluth is fucking terrific. In pretty much every way. He's funny, he's good looking and he treats women like shit. A total catch.
And when you're Gob Bluth, why drive a car when a Segway would do?
He's setting a trend that is slowly taking over the world. I saw some middle-aged dude this morning riding his Segway into the small town where my parents live. Like he was just going for a little ride, picking up a few groceries and then driving home to a happy wife, 2.5 smiling kids and a white picket fence. When your means of transportation is a Segway, you live life a little bit better.
I spent my money that I earned from turning tricks on an iPhone. I'm not thrilled that I had to make the switch from Verizon to AT&T and frankly everything about setting this thing up has been a pain in my ass.
But I CAN LOOK AT PORN ON MY PHONE!!!!!
Elsewhere, your cool app suggestions in the comments. I have the basics and this thing called Love Calculator which tells me that I am 73% with Erin Andrews.
A friend recently turned 18 and reader/contributor/sex fiend JMC and I showed him the ways at a Gentleman's Club. The girls were unbelievably hot -- not that I should've been surprised, but I totally was -- and the environment inviting.
Candi's studying nursing. Just one year to go!
It basically reinforced my thought that a strip club manager is a job that all men should aim for. You know those dudes get a sample of the goods before they hire them. I might have to look into if you have to like take a class or something for that.
Meanwhile, sports are going on. Not many of them. Baseball and a bunch of things that real sports fans don't care much about.
Carlos Zambrano hit his third homer of the year today. That's more than Russell Martin, Nomar Garciaparra and just about anyone on the Giants. He could be trade bait for a team that's looking for a bat and erratic pitcher.
I happen to like Fat Tire. I find it rich, nutty and flavorful. My buddy, whose taste in beer I respect, said this weekend that he doesn't really like Fat Tire because it sorta tastes like a foot.
Certainly wouldn't choose Fat Tire if I could drink one beer and only one beer. But it'd probably be in my top five.
If you can drink one beer and one beer only, what would it be? If you say Corona, I'm going to be a little disappointed.
Saw this movie Knowing with Nicolas Cage and a few kids who would be better off with duct tape over their mouths.
It was kinda cool in an eerie, twisty, world-ending kind of way. It wasn't like a good movie or anything but I was enjoying it and then they get to the ending and it seems like they said, "Aw fuck. We have no idea how to end this. Let's just blow shit up and then blame it on aliens." Like seriously, there were fucking aliens that came in with like six minutes left in the movie. WHAT THE FUCK! It would be like watching Schindler's List and then at the end blaming the Holocaust on UFOs.
Here's the full gallery of Sabrina Jane. Case of the Mondays my ass.