Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Whoa whoa whoa, wait a second...Martina Navratilova is a lesbian?!

Former tennis great Martina Navratilova is a lesbian. This would be awesomer news if her name was Anna Kournikova or Maria Sharapova. It's not. We're going to show a picture of Sharapova instead because if we showed Navratilova, you wouldn't like lesbians as much as you currently do. Don't say we never looked out for you.

Nonetheless, Navratilova is being threatened by her former partner if she doesn't pay up in the settlement. The NY Post with your messy legal lesbian mumbo-jumbo.
The longtime lesbian lover of Martina Navratilova is threatening to air the tennis great's dirty laundry if she doesn't get a settlement to her liking based on their eight years together.

"There are a lot of skeletons in Martina's closet. It is more like a storage facility full of them, and I know them all," said Toni Layton, who left her computer salesman hubby, Jeffrey Lambert, for the nine-time Wimbledon champ and claims she helped nurture and enrich her career during their time together.

Layton has tried to negotiate a settlement with the world's former No. 1 women's player for a year, only to have Navratilova's lawyers threaten "to publicly discredit Toni and humiliate her," Layton's flack, Gary Smith, said. "[But] Navratilova's team has another thing coming if they think we are going to just lie down and be steamrolled."
Show of hands: who knew Navratilova won Wimbledon nine times? And who can visualize Anna Kournikova, who's never won anything?

That's what we thought. And we call ourselves sports fans.

[Via Ben Maller]


rstiles said...

There is NO DOUBT Maria shaves her pussy...look how low that bikini bottom goes!!!

Mr. Ace said...

I would bang Navratilova, no doubt. Her and carpet munching pal.

GMoney said...

Call me crazy, but I want Martina's dirty laundry to be aired out publicly. Can you imagine how awesome that would be for the blogosphere.

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