Friday, August 14, 2009

We really want to make jokes about this, but internal bleeding of the testicle is no laughing matter

Be grateful you woke up this morning and your junk was intact and working properly. Because Adrian Beltre's won't be for some time.
Mariners third baseman Adrian Beltre injured his testicle last night after a groundball took a bad hop and hit him in the groin area. No, he does not wear a protective cup.

There was some tearing of the testicle and apparently is some internal bleeding in there. The team is going to wait a bit to see whether he requires surgery. If the surgery was to take place, he would need a month's recovery time. If there's no surgery, he'd need about 10 days to two weeks.

TEARING?!?! INTERNAL BLEEDING!?!? Testicles aren't supposed to absorb that kind of punishment. Gentle cupping and stroking is all the treatment they need.


GMoney said...

He plays third goddamn base. WHY ISN'T HE WEARING A FUCKING CUP!!! He deserved it.

HM said...

Any player who isn't an outfielder and is not wearing a cup is a complete idiot. Jesus.

Even for outfielders -- I remember Eric Davis batting one time and a running fastball from a righthander came inside and hit him pretty solidly in the junk.

Bokolis said...

If you're thick enough, it'll (somewhat effectively) function as a cup. We might have just found out something about Beltre.

Didn't see the play but, maybe the play-by-pay guys will now call similarly hit ground balls as "...there's a nutcracker to third." I have a feeling Beltre's going to be fielding those kind of jokes for a while.

John said...

a number of years back josias manzanillo (sp?) took a 100MPH line drive off manny ramirez's bat in the crotch. amazing part: he still made the play and if i recall correctly, later had surgery on both testicles. i also think he said he still wouldn't wear a cup. he didn't exactly last much longer though...