Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Cracking down on jaywalking is the first step to cleaning up the nasty streets of Seattle, which aren't really nasty and they're totally fine


Look both ways before you cross the street in Seattle because there might be a cop there waiting to bust you for jaywalking.

That's what happened to White Sox GM Kenny Williams who didn't cross at a crosswalk and is a bad, immoral person because of it, except he's not because all he did was jaywalk, which is like getting in trouble in school for not raising your hand.
Williams was ticketed Monday for jaywalking outside Safeco Field for illegally crossing a street away from a crosswalk, the Associated Press reported. Williams was on his cell phone after exiting a cab and was on his way into the stadium when a traffic-control officer nabbed him and wrote a $56 ticket. Williams tried to tell the officer people in Chicago cross streets anywhere. He said the officer told him, not in Seattle.
They're really cracking down on jaywalking in Seattle. Have been for years. Our sophomore year at UW, there was a mini riot in the Greek System where like some cars were flipped and maybe set on fire and because of that the Seattle police responded by cracking down on jaywalking. It didn't really make sense, but the police felt better about things and people were more careful when crossing the street and frankly the world was a better place for it.

[Chicago Tribune via Ben Maller]

7 comments:

Bokolis said...

WTF is the world coming to? Please tell me the cop recognized Williams and decided to make an example of him. Giving tickets for jaywalking would be fine by me, so long as it entitles you to call the cop a cunt.

Oh, well. Speaking of cunts, at least Youkilis got thrown to the ground by someone who wanted no part of him. Now that we've seen that he can't fight, it's gotta be open fucking season on him (as if it weren't already).

Chris said...

It really isn't his fault, in Chicago jay walking is viewed as harmless as rape.

Lawless town.

GMoney said...

"Jaywalking is serious"--Dante Stallworth

JMC said...

I've definitely seen people get tickets for Jaywalking on the Ave in Seattle.

HM said...

To follow up on GMoney -- had anyone flashed their lights at Kenny Williams? If so, I believe that the law allows you to run him down if you are willing to spend almost a month in jail.

The cop did Kenny a favor.

John said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
John said...

@Bokolis

As a Red Sox fan I obviously see things through rose-colored glasses, but what do you have against Youkilis? Sure he's quirky as fuck, but he plays the game hard and doesn't mouth off to the media or anything. He also has a great sense of humor:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IY_xEjuLMAk

In addition, every time I see your user name on here I envision some kind of portmanteau of bokononism and youkilis, ironically.