Monday, October 20, 2008

Rays, motherfuckers!!!!! RAYS!!!!!(!&D!~!!!!DK!!!&!

It's strange to think, that we had so much invested in a team, in a series, that is 2850.95 miles away.

But we did.

To see Tampa blow Game Five brought back memories of The Game Giants Fans Do Not Speak Of. We shouldn't have cared so much.

But we did.

And like the rest of the doubters, realists and cynics out there, we thought the Rays were fucked liked a bleached blond with insecurity issues on a movie set in the San Fernando Valley.

But they weren't. Tampa, which gave History the middle finger all season, gave it one more time when it counted most. From DRaysBay:

The coldest story was to be told tonight. The Rays were done. History was against them, but history doesn't play baseball. This team has shown again and again how true that is.

We'll admit that part of our new-found affinity for the Rays is a combined love of the youth movement/underdog story and a hatred for Boston and New York.

For the Rays to essentially beat Boston twice -- by winning the AL East and now the pennant -- makes it that much sweeter. The Red Sox are the new Yankees and anyone who tries to deny that is terribly naive. And Boston's fans are far more fucking fucktastic, which clearly is a bad thing.

And once the Red Sox miraculously took Game Five, everyone thought that was it for the series. Had Boston been able to complete the series comeback, not only would it have been an epic comeback that only furthered our hatred for everything Boston, it would have overshadowed Tampa's tremendous season.

Sure, the last-to-first story still would have been written down in the history books, but the Rays' season would be remembered for blowing a 3-1 series lead and a 7-0 lead in the seventh. A tough pill to swallow after a fabulous year.

But a very well-pitched Game Seven and a perfect management of the bullpen by Joe Maddon wrote the next chapter in this fucking fairy tale. (That was a cliché-laden sentence).

Fitting, too, that when David beat Goliath, it was David Price that came through. Four tough outs have pretty much told Rays fans that Tampa's next rising star has already rose.

When Akinori Iwamura touched second base, recording the final out, we couldn't help but clap, pump our fist and high-five the girlfriend who may or may not have known that she was watching baseball. We were -- and are -- genuinely excited about a team nearly 3,000 miles away. That's sports for ya.

So there it is. Fuck Boston. Go Rays. It's time for a World Series mohawk. Who's with us?


Anonymous said...

I would go with the mohawk...but I'm about a world series skullet?

rstiles said...


Bokolis said...

Fuck Boston

JMC said...

I was thinking the same thing about feeling invested in the series. I couldn't imagine how fucking tense I would have been if that were my team. Actually I can imagine it... thanks to the year that shall not be named.

GMoney said...

I was just happy to see that Joe Maddon finally realized that Dan Wheeler is a dumpster baby and not a closer.

Get some fucking contact lenses, too, Maddon, you pretentious asshole.

lipner said...

was it me or are the rays run by a bunch of young jewish kids who couldn't be much older than, say, the big picture? it adds another reason to why i can get behind this team, 3k miles away or not. take notes giants brASS, the rays have done it right.