So we'll respond to a series of emails that have come in over the last few months. Of course Lozo gave us the idea, and you guys the emails.
Why call it The Big Picture?
It was the name of our column at the college newspaper. And we wanted to write about national sports, so we thought of a cliché that could sum it all up. And it sounds better than, "Our Broad Take on Sports."
What teams do you root for?
The Giants, the Huskies and Barbaro -- even if he's dead.
If you could change one thing in sports, what would you change?
Joe Buck and the Marlins' uniforms. That was two.
What really pisses you off?
Not scoring a runner from third with less than two outs, overpriced drinks, the NBA, Joe Buck, American Idol, people who speak badly of Carmen Electra, prude girls, MTV.
What's your beef with Joe Buck?
He touched us when we were little. No really, he tried to show us his penis once. No really, he's just the most mundane sportscaster and can turn the most exciting event into a snoozefest. And he tried to have sex with us.
So who's your favorite sportscaster?
Mike Patrick, Gus Johnson, Ron Franklin and pretty much any CBS college football broadcast team.
Best chain restaurant?
Oxymoron, but we sure feel like family at the Olive Garden.
Has the blog helped you with girls?
Wilt Chamberlain has been asking for advice.
Why do you like fake breasts so much?
The same reason we like when girls wear make-up: it makes them look better. Have you seen Kim Kardashian without makeup? Holy shit! Run for the hills!
Are you serious?