You know what really grinds my gears?
I mean, have you ever played organized football? You looked like your brother out there. A fucking quadriplegic could throw better than you.
Brady Leaf is nobody's friend. If Brady Leaf were an ice cream flavor, he'd be pralines and dick.
Pinch your penis, ass clown. That's the last time you'll touch it. Or any one will touch it. You will never feel the warmth of a woman again. The ladies at Oregon will turn to masturbation and lesbianism before sleeping with you. They don't fuck losers.
I don't even like Oregon, but watching you "play" is like watching a fucking glacier melt. Throwing three-yard dump passes with the clock ticking down grinds my gears. That's bullshit, man. Throw it downfield. You should have benched yourself. Jonathan Stewart could play QB better than you.
So enjoy being a failure. It runs in the family.