Thursday, April 24, 2008

Sparing you from seeing another terrible movie

We hate bad movies and we suspect you do too, so we're going to do you a public service today and tell you exactly what "What Happens in Vegas..." will be about to save you $10 and two hours of your life.

*Disclaimer: Cameron Diaz looks super-duper hot in this movie. If you see it strictly for that, you're not entirely stupid and impressionable. If you see it because that's the only way your girlfriend will give you a little suckie-suckie, you're not entirely stupid and impressionable.

OK, the detailed plot outline:

-Two attractive people go to Vegas
-Get drunk
-Inevitably, each main character has hackneyed sidekick
-Cameron Diaz, looking waaay hot, does not take off clothes
-Two attractive people get married in drunken stupor
-Regret it in morning
-End up gambling, because -- hey! -- it's Vegas and that's what people do there
-Win big
-Diaz still clothed
-Argue over who money belongs to
-Try to separate and hate each other along the way, with trite romantic-comedy gimmicks along the way
-Sad part of movie where they are unsure whether or not problems will be resolved.
-End up falling in love (resolving problems), keeping money together (or donating) and living happily ever after
-Diaz still no frontal

And now you have seen "What Happens in Vegas..."

You're welcome.


GMoney said...

Cameron Diaz is not hot. They stole this movie idea from Ned Flanders' real life experience.

JMC said...

dude you fucking ruined it! I was totally gonna go see it this weekend. Thanks a lot asshole.

NFL Adam said...

JMC totally ruined by snappy comeback because I was going to say that.

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