Friday, August 11, 2006

Banned from your favorite ballpark

In a sad but true tale, Scott Harper (aka Jean Pierre Bosnia) has been banned from the famous Yankee Stadium. Why you ask? Well, because last August, at the house that Ruth built, Scott thought it would be a good idea to jump off the upper deck into the netting behind home plate. What would compel somebody to do something so stupid is beyond us. Perhaps Maurice Clarett could shed some light on the subject.

In any case, we got to wondering: Was it worth it? Was jumping off the upper deck in Yankee stadium worth the lifetime ban? (let's ignore the probable jail sentence) We think not. Sure, it may have been kinda fun, and yeah, the guy's famous, but any die-hard baseball fan would be devastated to learn they could never see their favorite team in person (at home) ever again.

Which brings us to the subject of this post: What could you do that would get you banned from a stadium, but would still be worth it? In order to qualify the act must be either incredibly fun, so spectacular that you instantly become an international sex-symbol, or so bizarre that it makes for a story that never gets old. Gold star if it satisfies all three.

Please share your ideas in the comments section. Some things to get the discussion started:

AT&T Park Mays Field, San Francisco: Catapult yourself off the arcade in right field, catch a Barry Bonds homerun in mid-air, and then complete a triple twisting double backflip dive with no splash into McCovey Cove.

Fenway Park, Boston: Bungee jump off the green monster. Steal Manny's Oakley Thumps when you reach bottom.

Wrigley Field, Chicago: Dress up like ivy. Hide in the center field wall. Scare the shit out of Juan Pierre when he goes to track down a fly ball.

McAfee Coliseum, Oakland: Sneak into the upper deck with a few buckets of water. Turn the baggies into a water slide. Try not to fall into the second deck.

Yankee Stadium, New York: Whip it out. Piss all over the NY logo behind home plate.

-Jameson "Pavel Barbados" Costello


Mini Me said...

HAHAHA Wrigley Field one is priceless. Funny stuff!

insomniac said...

I thought it was just the whiskey sours at lunch talking, but the Wrigley Field image had me rollin.

Tim Moore said...

hahaahahahd, ivy, wow.

angel stadum: sneak some laundry detergent in and pour it inot the fountians.

childish.. i know.

NFL Adam said...

I think having sex with Anna Benson in the dugout suites while Kris Benson was pitching would be pretty cool.

JMC said...

How bout right here in Seattle: Bring a rifle. Shoot the Mariner Moose. Hang his head on your living room wall.

naw, that's fucked up.

Matt said...

Anyone willing to defecate on home plate would get "mad props" from me.

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