Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Big Picture Categories: Johnsons in the NFL

King's Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there's ample drinking and sometimes -- on a few lucky occasions -- hot chicks end up naked. One of the best "games" in King's Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

The NFL is littered with players whose last name is Johnson. Go up and down every roster and if you don't come across at least one Johnson, you're probably looking in the wrong place. And speaking of Johnson, remember the Big Johnson t-shirt line. Good shit, friends. Good shit.

Honoring Big Johnson tees and professional football, today's category is naming those NFL players whose last name is Johnson. We'll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. First person to mess up will be thrown in a dark alley with the man pictured.

We'll start things up with our boy from U-Dub: Tank Johnson.

All right, football fans. Prove you know your nameology in the comments.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ocho Cinco, Chad Johnson of the Cincinnati State Penitentiary Bengals

The Real Sevenmack said...

And Chad's lovable sidekick, Rudi Johnson. Unlike a certain Johnson named Keyshawn, Rudi doesn't pull and pot-calling-kettle-black B.S.

rstiles said...

Current Player - Andre Johnson, wr, Texans

Former Player - Billy "White Shoes" Johnson

Anonymous said...

Larry Johnson, RB, Kansas City Chiefs

Kevin Hayward said...

Brandon Johnson, AZ linebacker. There are three johnsons on the Cardinals' roster alone.

Jarrett Carter said...

Calvin Johnson, Detroit Lions

Chase said...

Jarrett Johnson, LB/DE, The Baltimore Ravens...

We replaced Adalius with a big ass white guy from Alabama... How does that work?

The Real Sevenmack said...

Dear Matt:
Grab a cock and a smile and leave this blog. Oh, and eat shit and crawl into a fetal position too.

Wish you'd get a life:

The rest of us

GMoney said...

I have to give matt credit though, not many people can type and suck 2 dicks at the same time.

We'll go with uber-shitty former QB Rob Johnson since matt ruined this for all of us again.

The Real Sevenmack said...

Matt:
Didn't you get the message? Nobody wants to slowly turn their unlonely eyes to you. Go back to eating dicks, as you usually do, and enjoy it. Stay off this blog.

Once again, vamos:

Mrs. Robinson and Joe DiMaggio

ESPnGuy said...

I once knew a guy named matt, he was the guy that never got picked, so he would take the ball and run away

....fucking douche

Anonymous said...

i dont even know who this matt fuck is but i want to drag him out back and give him and old school country ass kicking. the only happy ending here is that awkward whistling sound we here coing from your mouth after i kick in your front teeth you cum guzzling queen.

The Big Picture said...

matthew,

you're banned from commenting, remember? censorship's a bitch, huh?

The Real Sevenmack said...

Go eat a dick and fall into a toilet. Ass.

JMC said...

this is getting ridiculous. Zach, you may have to make it so you have to have a blogger account to comment.

ESPnGuy said...

anyway...

TE Eric Johnson of my streaking hot (2 IN A ROW!!) Saints...

Anonymous said...

Leon Washington, RB, Jets

Dinur said...

Bryant Johnson, AZ WR

youth batting instruction said...

Is free agent Rich Harden being undervalued in professional baseball?

Yes, it seems like we’re scraping the peanut butter jar of baseball free agents. Most teams tend to stay away from scraps while others will stick their finger in the jar and lick it clean. Now a days when you’re surfing the baseball market you have to be one of those general managers that think outside the box and find valuable baseball players that other teams might overlook. If you’re down to the wire and on January 31st for baseball player picks you will most likely get that player at steal, highway robbery if you will.

Host PPH said...

I haven't played King's cup but I hope that one day we can do it. It would be amazing.