Jeez, Erin Andrews, get off your high horse

Did you know that Erin Andrews hasn't been on TV since her "incident" where she was hardly visible through blurry lines, yet was naked and then the Internet pounced and thus there was an "incident?" She hasn't. Cause and effect, too. That seems a bit unnecessary.

Yet Andrews recently went on Oprah to talk about this horrible incident where she was hardly visible through blurry lines and will try to put this behind her.

ESPN reporter Erin Andrews said in an interview with Oprah Winfrey that having secretly videotaped nude footage of her distributed on the Internet was a "nightmare."

Scary. Like that dream where you're falling. Or being chased. Or where you have to pull the trigger to shoot the bad guy but you don't have the strength to pull the trigger because you're in REM sleep. Or the dream where you're naked in public...Oh. Hmm.

Andrews also tells Winfrey she "opened up the computer [and] could feel my heart pounding."

Who knows who may have seen the video of her as she was hardly visible through blurry lines? What if her dad saw it? Oh no!

Andrews will be working on air Thursday night for the first time since the video became widespread news. She'll be the sideline reporter for ESPN's broadcast of South Carolina at North Carolina State.

Ooh, South Carolina vs. NC State. Could be OK. What will Spurrier have up his leave? NC State hasn't been good in a while. Who are we kidding? This game isn't going to be very good at all. Probably will try to get in some Netflix instead. Or maybe read a book. Reading books is way underrated, yet we feel people -- including us -- don't do it enough. There are some very good books out there. We should check them out. But the ones Oprah suggests are bullshit. Don't listen to her.

Anyways, Andrews has every right to file lawsuits and do legal stuff with lawyers and courts and Judge Judy, but it's over, you could hardly make out a boob, and nobody really cares anymore. Shouldn't we be making a bigger deal out of the fact that you're dating David Wright? Conflict of interest, man.

[Unrelated: We were sent some awesome sports keychains from Wholesale Keychains. They were awesome in a keychain kind of way. Whatever that means.]

Something about the reaction to the Erin Andrews mess just seems wrong

We were among the first to give Erin Andrews attention in an objectifying way on a blog. We kept doing it because it's fun to have pictures of a hot chick while simultaneously making penis jokes.

Now that this video has surfaced, many blogs and media outlets are coming out in defense of EA about how wrong and horrible the making of this video was. And it is wrong and awful and sorta hot and vile and wretched. But so is all of the attention we're bringing it.

With the plethora of blog posts now dedicated to this incident, we're bringing more attention to this mess than it deserves. If this happened to Shelley Smith we don't think anybody would really care. Had this story not been reported ad nauseam by blogs and now mainstream media, we (and likely many others) would have never even known about this.

And, naturally, with every post saying how wrong this is, there's a nice picture of EA to remind you that she's cute and innocent and pretty attractive, all at the same time. (That's why we chose a photo of Inés Sainz, instead. She's totally hotter anyway).

At the same time, while all the blogs are citing this an act of the devil, anyone who's ever written about EA has had their traffic increase significantly the last few days. She's currently holding the No. 4 and 5 spots on Google Trends because people are trying to go masturbate to this video. So while this is an awful, tragic, horrible, disgusting, blah, blah, blah event, our traffic has increased about 100% since Saturday.

Should we feel guilty? No. Sometimes we feel guilty that we mix milk and meat and that we used to listen to 311. But to have written about her a while back in a tongue-in-cheek way is fair game.

Taking illegal videos of her is not. Nor, should it be, bringing a ridiculous amount of attention to something that has nothing to do with any of us. This is something for lawyers and courts. Let's stick to what we know best: sports and dick jokes.

Someone made a horribly insensitive peehole video of Erin Andrews, which is wrong and illegal and WHY THE FUCK ARE WE JUST HEARING ABOUT THIS?!?!?

Um, someone made a peephole video of Erin Andrews nude in her hotel room last week. This is a violation of privacy and this is wrong and awful and terrible and illegal and ERIN ANDREWS WAS FRIGGIN' NAKED ON VIDEO!

Wonder if she was practicing her open in front of the mirror with mike in hand. That could have been exciting. Beats curling her hair.

Just shows you how out of the loop we are during the summer. We work 12-hour days, many of which are away from a computer, and we had no idea this happened until now and it's too late to go see the cached video.

Though we wouldn't want to do that anyway because this is so horribly wrong and sick and a violation of everything. She was naked though! That shit could sell! But it's wrong and horrible and awful.

Erin Andrews was like an 11 at the ESPYs

Didn't get to see much of the ESPYs as we were camping the last few days. But catching the replays, fuck, Erin Andrews looked incredible!

Now we'll let you in on a little secret: we would do her. Really. We would. We just wanted you to know a little more about us.

But jeez, she looked like 10 times better than she normally does and she's normally pretty hot. The magic of more make up, a slinky dress and some rare cleavage made her look more like a Playmate than a sideline reporter.

And of course this led to the debate of if/when she will do Playboy. You know the magazine is throwing $1 million+ at her, but perhaps it would cost her the ESPN job? Maybe she doesn't want to do it? Maybe our figures are wrong?

Whatever. Watch that video. It'll replace porn for the day.

Rumor: Erin Andrews to be in Playboy

That rumor? We just started it. Quick, spread the word. Maybe we can make it happen!

But isn't that where this is going, anyway? Andrews, who prior to winning Playboy's Sexiest Sportscaster, got some recognition on this site by beating out other female sportscasters in a 16-person tournament. But with her Internet fame, good looks and interesting sideline reports, what's next?

Gotta be Playboy. You just know the popular magazine is offering her at least a million to do a nude spread. And with her soaring popularity, Andrews' cover would fly off newsstands.

But maybe she doesn't want to pose nude. Agggh, who are we kidding? She's gonna do Playboy. Oooh, or Hustler. She should totally do Hustler.

Erin Andrews is like so hot

Erin Andrews really is the foundation of this site. We like to think that it's witty writing, good pictures and some neat interviews. But who the fuck are we kidding? Erin Andrews is the straw that stirs the drinks.

And no matter what NFL Adam thinks, she's a 10. Waaay hot.
So what better than a collection of hot pictures of Erin? Barstool Sports -- brilliant devils -- did the work for all of us and put together a post with a lot of pictures of Erin giving us (not you, asshole. Us.) bedroom eyes.

Check out the link and then go relieve some stress in the bathroom in Accounting. Don't fucking dare do it in the john in your department. That could get, ugh, messy.

And that picture is one of our favs of Erin. You can practically read her lips: "You and me. Right now."

In-person: the Home Run Derby

A wee bit late on this, but still, first-hand experience is sorta cool.

One of the very few perks about having Giants season tickets these days is that we had the strip to the All-Star game festivities. We sold the tickets to the actual All-Star game (covered nearly the cost of the season tickets!) and went to the Future's game last Sunday. We missed out on the Derby, but our bro and dad were there to soak it all in.

It was pretty much what we all expected: cool to be at the party, but the home-run hitting was pretty redundant. And no water shots. WTF?

We told our bro and dad to take pictures, pictures, pictures, and the ones here are three of many from the day.

McCovey Cove was packed like a bowl, the field looked great and Erin Andrews (bottom photo...it's like finding fucking Waldo) was there! Click each photo for a closer look.

We weren't really that upset about missing a once-in-a-lifetime chance to see grown men hit small balls awfully far, but it woulda been cool to be there and be part of the fun. And we would have liked to tell Erin that she's a fucking champion. She just doesn't know it yet.

A tribue to Ms. Erin Andrews

For closure on the "Would you do..." Tourney, we wanted to do something nice for the overpowering winner, Erin Andrews.

Ideally we'd interview her -- a pretty straight forward Q&A, though we'd be curious what she thought about TBP readers wanting to run through her. But banging a good Catholic girl, pre-maritally, in a church, with the congregation looking on would be easier than getting an ESPN employee's email address. (If you have ESPN insiders who might know Erin's email, holler at us).

Instead, we'll go with this nice montage of Erin.

Erin, we salute you! (And we'll totally take you out in Seattle if you're ever here. No cheap shit either).