Friday, April 11, 2008

Big Picture Categories: Keanu Reeves movies

King's Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there's ample drinking and sometimes -- on a few lucky occasions -- hot chicks end up naked. One of the best "games" in King's Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

Today is the release of the new Keanu Reeves flick Street Kings, which may or may not be horrible. It stars Common and The Game, so how could it go wrong? It got us thinking though, since Keanu is without doubt the best actor in the history of acting, we thought we'd brainstorm some of his movies by bringing back Big Picture Categories.

We'll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. One -- one! -- answer per comment, assbags. If you cheat and look up his IMDB page, we'll know. And the guilt will cause your penis to fall off.

We'll start with his best: Point Break.

If you've never seen Point Break, well, you should. It's once of the most acclaimed movies of all time, having won Best Picture awards in multiple years, which we're told is unprecedented if not impossible. It also won awards for best Foreign Film, best Animated Short and best Documentary, despite not being foreign, animated or true. (Keanu won Best Actor, too, but you already knew that).

Some memorable quotes from Point Break:

Australian cop at the end of the movie: We'll get him when he comes back in!
Johnny Utah: He's not coming back.

Roach: Hey man, I'm cold. Really cold.
Johnny Utah: You're cold because all of the blood is running out of your body Roach. You're gonna be dead soon.

Johnny Utah: You're blowing it, man! You're breaking your own rules...

We know you all love Keanu, so time to slang that knowledge in the comments. (Quotes welcomed!)

16 comments:

Bokolis said...

I freely admit that I checked IMDB, but that was for a listing of his stunt work in gay porn. There were no listings...I reported the vandalism.

In keeping with the blog's theme, The Replacements.

Anonymous said...

Have to go w/ Speed.

Anonymous said...

The Matrix

GMoney said...

The Devil's Advocate both sucked and blew.

Unknown said...

Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure

Anonymous said...

Hard Ball

Anonymous said...

bill and ted's bogus journey

Unknown said...

Point Break. Anthony Kiedis gets shot in the foot. Solid.

Josh said...

spencer, you douche, Point Break was already used, first.

now for the next douche, me: A Walk in the Clouds.

Unknown said...

That's right, I'm retarded. Let's go with Constantine.

Anonymous said...

This was up for the Oscar but didn't win: Johnny Mnemonic. Really, really, strong performance. Unbeatable script.

Anonymous said...

chain reaction

GMoney said...

The Lake House!!!

GMoney said...

Does "Speed 3: Glacier of Doom" count?

Anonymous said...

what about this classic...Parenthood. next to The Bill and Ted movies maybe the best movie he has been in...hahaha

Anonymous said...

It looked somewhat interesting, but I never saw it, partly because of Keanu...
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