Monday, February 16, 2009

Watching the NBA All-Star game is about as much fun as stubbing your toe

Or...
  • being on the toilet and realizing the toilet paper's low
  • eating organic produce
  • lifting heavy boxes
  • watching paint dry
  • ordering a chicken salad sandwich and getting served egg salad instead
  • attending art shows that don't serve wine
  • having pulsating car breaks
  • making spaghetti and realizing you don't have any pasta sauce
  • witnessing a hung jury
  • paying for something that costs $5.04 and getting 96 cents of change back because you didn't have four fucking pennies and the goddamn clerk wouldn't give you a bump.
  • untangling wires
  • wearing a shirt with an itchy tag
  • sitting through an entire episode of "King of the Hill"
  • trying to open a tightly-sealed jar when your hands are greasy
  • hearing grown men grunt in the gym
  • sitting in a chair that has one leg that's shorter than the others
  • movies with subtitles
  • Seeing a woman getting beaten and raped and not doing anything when she's crying out for help because you don't want to give up your spot in line to see "The Reader"
  • being forced to make a sandwich with the end piece of the loaf
  • paper jams in the printer you told the boss needed to be replaced but he wouldn't because "we have to tighten our belt a bit"
  • paper cuts
Add your own in the comments, you scoundrels.

4 comments:

  1. Anonymous12:15 AM

    sucks worse than:
    -realizing theres no alcohol in the house
    -having to watch a chick flick with a date that doesnt put out afterwards
    more boring than:
    -an 'america's next top model' all day marathon


    -noah

    ReplyDelete
  2. Playing wingman for your homie and having him take way too long to close the deal.

    Being trapped behind a bunch of cars all going the same speed.

    ReplyDelete
  3. worse than the NBA ASG:

    -the Daytona 500
    -Jared from Subway
    -women drivers
    -women voters
    -the missionary position
    -Everybody Loves Raymond
    -The Big Picture???

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous10:36 AM

    scraping your knees?

    ReplyDelete