We've been there, too, fellas. We've been there, too.What's an "Ikea Game?"
n. A game which results in so much anger, frustration and disappointment that it causes one to destroy anything and everything in their living room, leading to a trip to Ikea.
Alternate names: "Game that makes you want to tear your fucking heart out and feed it to Jeffrey Dahmer," "I fucking hate sports," "Kill me now."
You might have heard that Cal beat Washington in triple OT. Oh, it was a good game, you say? Well stick a rake up your ass, you fucking asshole. There was nothing good about that game.
For an objective fan? Great game, right? WRONG! This game sucked for everyone. Even Cal fans should hate this game because Washington fucking lost and the whole world should mourn a UW loss. The people who enjoyed this game are the same people that believe genocide, famine and disease are good things; that Hitler was a motivator; and that "The White Stripes" are a good band.
Here's a perfect rubric on how to piss away a game:
-Regulation: Give up a 10-point lead with 6:04 left by trying to nurse the clock.To make matters worse, we followed this game on ESPN.com's GameCast. Didn't see a minute of it. Just saw numbers change on a computer screen. Numbers that made our apartment look like it was hit by a motherfucking tornado.
-2nd OT: With Huskies leading 77-74, Washington's Justin Dentmon misses the second of two free-throw tries with nine seconds to go. Cal's Patrick Christopher misses a long three-point try, but D.J. Seeley gets the rebound and is fouled by UW's Isaiah Thomas while making the putback with one second left. Seeley hits the free-throw try. Game goes to 3rd OT.
-3rd OT: With Huskies leading 85-83, Cal's Theo Robertson hits driving jumper, gets fouled and converts the three-point play with 15 seconds remaining. Dentmon misses a jumper with five seconds remaining.
Yet, this was nothing in the grand scheme of our miserable existence as a sports fan. We've seen horrible collapses like this in much bigger settings -- playoff, World Series and March Madness games. This early-season bullshit doesn't even compare. Imagine us when the games really mattered; two words: Shit. Show.
But we want to hear about the worst games you've had to suffer through as a fan. 'Cause, hey, misery loves company.
Let's all have a good cry in the comments.
Saturday night was it for me. If anything like that ever happens again, I'll stop being a sports fan. My first thought when that thing was over was, "This is the worst day of my life".
ReplyDeleteOctober 13, 2007. Oklahoma State comes into Memorial Stadium - On homecoming, no less - and hangs 38 on the Huskers in the first half. Final: 45-14, Cowboys. My college roommate and I paid $40 for this piece of shit on FSN PPV. It also stung because I had to work that night so I couldn't even get properly shitfaced to distract myself from the misery.
ReplyDeleteThe '94 Orange Bowl sticks out, too, mostly because of the uncalled William Floyd fumble on a TD run and Byron Bennett shanking the last second field goal.
Lets start with today's Giants game. Awful...just plain awful. Not only should they have won this game, but I was fully expecting it. But whatever, it makes up for the amazingness of last year.
ReplyDeleteThen we have the end of the Nets mini-dynasty, game 7 of the 2004 conference semis. After dominating the Eats for 2+ years, its seemed inevitable that this would be the year we finally made it over the hump. But nooooooooooo, we had to crash back to earth instead. What a bad day before my birthday. That was followed by game 5 of the finals in 03, and pretty much all of getting manhandled by the Lakers in 02.
Then we have the grandaddy of them all, the Yankees in 04. I mean it wouldn't have been that bad if we didn't win game 3 19-8. But no, allthe 1918 chants were out the window and I had to wear a sox jersey for a day. Laugh all you want, I guess we deserve it. 2003 sucked too. And I guess 1995 can be counted, as my first disappointment in sports at age 6.
And there's my history of sports depression, which is ok considering 8 combined titles between the teams.
i was at the cal game -- brutal
ReplyDeleteAs a Yankees fan, the '95 loss to your Mariners will always haunt my dreams. It was the first time in my life that the Yankees had made the playoffs and it ended like that. Bullshit.
ReplyDeleteI watched that UW game in a bar in Berkeley and let me tell you, the Cal fans were havin a grand ol time.
ReplyDeleteWorst loss is and always will be the Giants losing game 6 in 2002. Thanks for making me think of that - as if Monday morning wasn't bad enough already.
Another bad one was the 49ers losing to the Falcons in the playoffs (or was in the NFC Championship) after Garrison Hearst's ankle exploded all over the Georgia Dome turf.
Here's one: the only time I've seen UVA in the NCAA tournament and they were on the wrong end of the 5-12 upset to Gonzaga.
Every Oklahoma Sooner post season game for the past 3 years. When will it end? But particularly the Boise State and WV
ReplyDeleteHow about the '98 NFC title game with Vikings and Atlanta. The whole week leading up to the game there was a confidence here in Minnesota that there was no way we were losing that game. Finally things would be different and the Vikes could win a Super Bowl. Then Denny F*ing Green takes the knee to go to overtime, and we loose.
ReplyDeleteTo make matters worse, I got a frantic call from my mom about an hour after the game. Her and her boyfriend had been watching that game, and he had a heart attack and died.
Kentucky vs. Duke, 1992. No explanation required.
ReplyDeleteGiants 20, Bills 19, Super Bowl XXV.
ReplyDeleteImagine if your favoriate team was loaded with Hall of Famers and won the AFC Championship 51-3 but then lost to Jeff Hostetler and a 98 year old O.J. Anderson. At my house party, 10 of us tossed in $5 each on the predicted final score. The $50 winner had "Bills 27, Giants 20." No one picked the Giants.
The words "wide right" still make me want to die.
1998 NBA Finals the Jazz are facing the bulls again. Michael Jordan came out of retirement just to stop the Jazz from winning and NBA title. 5 seconds left and the Jazz are winning all they have to do is stop Jordan for a game 7. Jordan cheats and pushes Bryon Russell and makes the game winning shot! I've never been so pissed off in my entire life! He already had 4 championships and they let him cheat to win another one. What fucking bullshit! If he would have just stayed retired we would have won 2 championships but noooo he just has to come out of retirement and beat us. I love Jordan but fuck him. Seriously.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard not to just list the words "Cleveland Sports" as an answer. I mean, Red Right 88. The Fumble. The Shot. Mesa Blowing it in '97. The hardest job in the world is to be a dedicated Cleveland sports fan. I suppose none of them top one. Even though it didn't finalize the game, they lost it in overtime.
ReplyDeleteThe Drive.
It's hurts just saying it.
Favored by 4 TD's to win the game and then on to the BCS Championship, my Mountaineers blow it to our most hated rival Pitt 13-9.
ReplyDeleteOne might think that it would be Game 6 of the 2003 NLCS between the Cubs and Marlins....
ReplyDeleteNope, not even close.
Game 7 was much worse. When the Cubs went up 5 to 3 in the 3rd that's when I started to worry.
I had not taken a sip of alcohol for three innings. I was too depressed from the night before.
Then came K. Wood's dinger and I felt that feeling only a Cubs fan can feel. Then we went ahead and it was full blown paranoia and butterfly's.
I just knew the Cubs were going to blow it (remember this is when they had the lead). Six innings was plenty of time for them to screw something up.
I drank so much and when the final out was recorded and the Cubs weren't making the WS I literally ripped the doors off my kitchen cabinets and heaved them through the condominium.
My downstairs neighbor knocked on my door and asked if I could keep it down (remember, it was almost midnight on a work night). I was shirtless, drunk, and sweating profusely. I calmly reached for my hat rack and pulled one of my many Cubs hats from it and showed it to him.
He had that look of "Oh, my bad" on his face, said I understand, and turned and walked away. That was the worst game ever.
(Note: I still love the Cubs they just don't love the fans!!!)
As a fan of the Indians and the Browns, I've got a few to choose from:
ReplyDeleteThe Drive.
The Drive II.
Red Right 88.
The Fumble.
1995 World Series Game 6.
1997 World Series Game 7.
2007 ALCS Games 5,6 and 7.
The worst of those for me would be the World Series in 1997. Only 2 outs away from the first World Series championship in 49 years.
Runner on first. All Mesa has to do is force Charles Johnson to hit a game ending double play ball to either 2B Tony Fernandez or SS Omar Vizquel. Instead, Johnson gets a hit to right field, the Marlins score to tie it up and eventually win it in the 11th.
I can still see in my mind the ball that Johnson just missing Fernandez' glove. I wonder if the Indians had Roberto Alomar instead, if the play would have been made.
Without a doubt it was Michigan's loss to App. State. Imagine being #5 in the country with Mike Hart, Chad Henne, Manningham, and then watching all of that evaporate in 3 hours of football against a FCS team that you thought you were going to roll over. I really just wanted to disappear at that moment because I just couldn't wrap my head around exactly what had happened (especially considering we had a game-winning field goal). If that kind of disappointment ever happens again, I just might stop watching sports.
ReplyDeleteAs for the worst pro loss, there is nothing that will top the game in which my beloved Cowboys blew it to the Seahawks. The entire game we were winning, but something in my gut told me it all was going to end poorly. And sure enough, the sport gods found the most painful way to do it. First, Terry Glenn can't hold on to the effing ball on the 2 yard line and gives up a safety that eventually leads to a Seattle TD and gives them the lead. But you know, here comes Tony Romo orchestrating a beautiful drive that appears to have captured a first down on Seattle's 3 yard line (I, to this day, still have no idea how the refs were positive that Witten did not get the first down on the challenge). Instead, we have to settle for a FG. Still though, I sat there thinking that having the lead sure beat being behind. But you know what, I was so nervous I had to leave the room. And sure enough, I hear a scream and come in the room only to see Romo tackled just short of the first down. My heart at that point exploded into millions of pieces as I literally fell to my knees. However, if that wasn't bad enough, there was still some hope for holding the Seahawks down there and maybe even get a winning safety. But you know what, the next play Alexander has his only good run for 30 yards. And as if all of this was not enough, I had to watch a hail mary literally miss Terry Glenn by less than a yard. Put it all together and you have only the second worst loss I have ever endured.
Nice post, and glad we have some support for Game 6 of the 2002 World Series. Blowing a 5 run lead in the 7th inning with 3 relievers who hadnt slipped up that much all season? Pretty painful, I was watching in Southern California, which made it exponentially worse.
ReplyDeleteFollowing on this Giants-related pain, I'd say the 2003 Marlins series qualifies as well, specifically the last 2 games. Starting with Jose Cruz dropping the can of corn to Pudge Rodriguez owning JT Snow, that game led to me skipping on a free concert to drink by myself. Maybe not an "Ikea Game," do we need a new category for that - a game so painful it leads you to drinking copious amounts of alcohol by yourself?
The 1996 World Series. The Braves win games 1 and 2 in Yankee Stadium, then absolutely choke. The actual furniture-smashing moment was, of course, Jim Leyritz's game 4 homer.
ReplyDeleteArizona and Illinois. Elite Eight. Coughing up a big lead and still having control of the last posession. Domination all season long but put a good defence on an inbounds pass, guard our first option, and Hassan Adams chucks up an errant three. End of season. Its still hurts. So does 4th & 26... both still haunt my dreams.
ReplyDelete1996 ALCS. Two words: Jeffrey Maier.
ReplyDeleteOhio State has been blowing football championships my whole life. After winning it in 1968, the Buckeyes had to only beat a Michigan team with a first year coach (Bo) to win their next one, as they were prohibited from going to the Rose Bowl a second straight year. They lost, 24-12. They followed that up the next year by losing to Stanford in the Rose Bowl. 2 losses in 3 years kept them from 3 straight nat'l championships. Then in 1975, after whipping UCLA early in the season in LA, they met again in the Rose Bowl, only to get beat, 23-9 for their only loss.
ReplyDelete2001, #4 Duke @ Cole Field House to face my #12 Terps.
ReplyDeleteDuke comes back down 10 in the last 1:01, including fucking Jason (a.k.a. Jay) Williams scoring 8 in the last 14 seconds. Game goes to OT and Maryland loses.
Worst day of my life.
i have 2 as an sf giants' fan:
ReplyDelete1. last day of the season in 1993 to the f-ing dodgers. 103 wins and no playoffs.
2. game 6, 2002 world series. f-ing scott spiezio.
for the 49ers:
1990 nfc championship losing to the giants after roger craig's fumble. the were going from the 3 peat.
golden state warriors:
i'm kidding, they've been awful for most of my young adulthood.
As a Rams fan, SB 36 tops them all. I threw a dining room table causing a gaping hole in the wall of the apartment I lived in at the time. And, yes, I was renting. Watching the Patriots, by far the inferior team then,win 2 more Super Bowls and the Rams fall to a franchise-worst 2-14 record has only added to the misery. Had the Giants not beaten them last year I may very well had blown my brains out.
ReplyDeleteJanuary 2002 - NY Giants vs. 49ers. 24 point lead. Garcia to Owens, twice. Trey Junkin. 'Fire drill'.
ReplyDeleteFirst and only time I've cursed at my mother. I sat in a silent, seething rage for an hour after that game ended and then she picked the wrong time to ask me what was wrong.
The refs screwed the pooch on the last play, but no one remembers that.
Man is this a great thread. Haven't we all been kicked in the balls at some point? The most recent was this year's Apple Cup. It didn't mean much in the big picture, but, much like yesterday's game, there is no way UW should have lost that game. One of the worst is being on the bench as a freshman and watching our high school basketball team lose two nights in a row by a total of 3 points. A win in either game would have sent us to the state tourny. Not good times.
ReplyDeleteWatching the Seahawks outgain the Steelers and still lose the Superbowl was pretty fun too.
ReplyDelete2003 Aaron Bleepin' Boone
ReplyDeleteNo question. The Cardinals-Bears Monday night game from 2 years ago. The Cardinals had a 23-3 lead in the second half and lost 24-23. It was same same game that head coach Denny Green went off with the famous "THEY ARE WHO WE THOUGHT THEY WERE" clip. And what's worst is the Bears offense did nothing they entire game. Rex Grossman played awful. The only reason they won was because of 2 defensive touchdowns and a Devin Hester punt return late in the 4th quarter. I've been a Cardinals fan for a long time, but that game just made me sick.
ReplyDeleteAs a Mizzou fan, I have 3.
ReplyDelete1. 5th down. Colorado "scores" the winning TD on 5th down.
2. Flea "kicker" vs. Nebraska.
3. Tyus Edney. 4.7 seconds. Enough said.
Aaron Boone in the 03 ALCS was easily the most numbing loss of my life.
ReplyDeleteAlthough UCLA losing to Florida in the title game when they were favored was so shockingly stunning I couldn't even bring myself to watch the second half.
1999 NCAA final--Duke loses to UCONN. I'm still convinced that was the best college hoops team I've ever seen--Brand, Battier, Langdon, Avery, Carrawell--Magette couldn't even crack the starting lineup!!
ReplyDeleteUCONN shoots over 70% for the game as senior defensive specialist Ricky Moore has the game of his life. UCONN keeps running a pick and roll with El Amin and Voskuhl and Duke keeps switching it and El Amin keeps hitting jumpers as Brand has to back off him.
Despite all of that Duke has the rock and a chance to win at the end and they give it to...Langdon to penetrate?! Really? You don't Avery driving and Langdon spotting up? Coach K? You there?
1998 Sweet 16...
ReplyDeleteRIP HAMILTON's game winner over UW.
I fucking hate Rip Hamilton.
As a Cubs and Colts fan, I have plenty of examples, but three come to mind.
ReplyDelete1. The Bartman Game: No more needs to be said about that.
2. 1995 AFC Championship Game: Aaron Bailey drops a Hail Mary from Jim Harbaugh that was literally on his chest and then fell off. The game that made most Colts fans of my generation die-hard fans.
3. 2005 AFC Divisional Playoff. You play terrible football all day, the refs give you a gift of all-time by blowing a clear Troy Palomalu INT, Jerome Bettis fumbles at the goal line to put the game away, Nick Harper picks up the fumble but gets taken down by Ben Rothlesberger because his girlfriend fucking stabbed him in the knee the night before, and to top it all off, Mike "Liquored-Up Idiot Kicker" Vanderjagt misses everything on a game-tying kick indoors......sigh....what a loss.
Ahhh, to be a sports fan in America.
The entire 2008 Detroit Lions season.
ReplyDeleteTry being a Vikings fan! I was at the 1998 (season) NFC Championship game against the Falcons. We were 15-1, scored 550-560 points that season, we had Randy Moss, Cris Carter, Robert Smith and a rejuvenated Randall Cunningham.
ReplyDeleteUp 27-17 going into the 4th Quarter. Denny fricken Green goes into shut-down mode and the Falcons come back to tie the game at 27. Then, as we all know, Gary Anderson misses his only FG of the season late in the 4th. However, what people don't remember is that we got the ball back with 40 seconds left and 1 timeout. What do we do....KNEEL!!! That's right, we kneeled on the ball with second best offensive team in NFL history.
Game goes to overtime, we win the toss, receive, but go 3 and out b/c we have absolutely no rhythm. Falcons go down the field, kick the game winning field goal and POOF. Our dream season was over!
2007 Cal football loss to Oregon State... trip to IKEA and some spackling after that one, as Kevin Riley's run that allowed the clock (and our dreams of being #1, even if just for a week) to expire led to me jumping out of the IKEA folding chair I'd been sitting and kicking it into the wall behind me, creating a surprisingly substantial dent in that wall... holy crap, that one killed.
ReplyDeletewhat a great thread!
ReplyDeletethanks for all who've shared. some great...err...horrible games there.
bringing suffering suffering fans together has a healing-element to it.
Bills/Cowboys on Monday night last year. As a lifelong Bills fan and Cowboy hater,it was absolute torture watching that loss on a last second field goal.
ReplyDeleteCost me a lazy boy and a new paint job to my living after tossing things!
The games that hurt me the most are those in which I've played or cost me money. Those stories are for another time and place.
ReplyDeleteAs a fan, I've always been too analytical. I usually see it coming. I would get aggravated, but it's never tear-your-heart-out bad. Now I'm to old to give a fuck.
Prior to 1994, Rangers fans took the end of every season hard. Right up there was '92, where they had the best record, but a bunch of fucked up shit happened to bury them in the series against the Penguins.
From recent memory, I would imagine that the horror of knowing what was about to come after Bartman had to be the hardest.
as a fan:
ReplyDeletethe '07 cal season, 5-0 start to an 7-6 finnish (with bowl game)
the '02 world series
as an athlete:
missing the finals by .2 seconds and under 2 feet during the '06 cjs (its a crew race, look it up)
-noah
UC Santa Barbara beats Cal State in the final 1.2 seconds after an inbounded ball is tipped, hit about 60 feet in the air, the ball lands, scooped up by a Gaucho defender, he takes a dribble and shots a miracle, half-court three.
ReplyDeleteHow this all happened in 1.2 seconds can never be explained. The worst part? It was a home game for Cal State.
noah -english? I couldn't find anything about that race/couldn't think of any regattas that hold that acronym. maybe i'm spacing...
ReplyDeleteimmediate thoughts (all as a fan):
-Sweet Sixteens of '06 (Mike Jensen being the operative name)
-Justin Dentmon in any game except the Cal game (can you say selfish player/liability?)
-Opening Day '06 when Russia sent their FUCKING NATIONAL BOAT.
-IRAs '08 were not fun in any way shape or form as a fan. Not only did UW lose by half a second, but everyone I know had practice during the race so we didn't even get to listen to it... damn 6am race time.
-UW/Hawaii game of '07. The refs were HUGGING the players.
Spencer, Colts fan here i feel your pain.
ReplyDeleteDont hate New England but Pittsburgh has killed us as they beat us in the playoffs in 75, 76, 95, 96, and 05.
As you metioned the 95 Hail Mary from the 29 as we were down 4, the Bettis fumble, but i have more.
Vanderjagt missing the fg in Miami in 2000 & Harbaugh getting banged up of the 1st series in 96 and getting blown out in the 2nd half.
And since i like the underdog and thought it would be their year, Gonzaga and Adam Morrison choking against UCLA.
It's gotta be the loss of my left nut to a mixer. R.I.P. "Lefty."
ReplyDeletejazz-
ReplyDeletecrew is a specialised sport, you kinda have to know where to look (and my bad, its officially called USRowing Southwest Regional Junior Championship Regatta, CJs is the nickname crew teams use)
my race can be found at:
http://www.racetrak.com/central/public/RaceResultsrep.asp?RegattaChoice=117&IncludeAge=on&PartChoice=none&SortingChoice=ASCALL&HeatChoice=ALL&EventChoice=1546
im in the Berkeley High School Crew Boat A, losing to the Los Gatos Rowing Club Boat B (the second heat)
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ReplyDelete