Osi Umenyiora out for season; more time for Cleveland Steamers

Osi Umenyiora, of New York Giants and Cleveland Steamer fame, is going to miss the upcoming NFL season with a knee injury.

We'll let the Yahoo! report sum it up:

Osi Umenyiora is out for the season with a knee injury.

This is devastating news for the defending champs as they'll now be without a Pro Bowl blah blah blah...

Osi Umenyiora once shat on a girl! Like what the fuck! That's degrading and awful and crass and animalistic and...fuck! Osi Umenyiora once dropped a duke on a woman! We find this inherently the funniest thing ever.

This kind of reminds us about our own bowel movements. If we were to defecate on a woman -- which we wouldn't, by the way, because we have all sorts of issues with shitting when women are present and it's horribly degrading -- it would be like an hour-long process.

Osi shits on a woman for pure, sexual pleasure. Nothing about our shits are pleasurable. Not even close. It's like we would do our thing on her chest (which, again, we absolutely would never do) and she would be like, "you're an asshole, but let's move on." And we'd be like, "baby, it's gonna be a while. Maybe you should go for a run or read a magazine or go to a movie or something cuz this is gonna take a bit."

So, yeah, Osi Umenyiora is out for the year and the Giants' pass rush isn't going to be very good.