It doesn't matter what city they're in, what sport they play, or what uniforms they wear. Certain teams fucking suck. And there are a lot of teams out there who, we believe, everyone can collectively hate.So we put together a list -- organized by sport -- of some teams that we think we can all root against together.
Call us out in the comments if we're way off. And, of course, leave your thoughts on the teams you personally hate (think: geographical reasons). Our list of teams we hate will lead things off.
Let the hate begin...
MLB:
Red Sox - Most obnoxious fans, evah. Fack you, ya facking queers.
Yankees - Like we need a reason.
NFL:
Patriots - See Red Sox comment. And Brady's a cockweasel.
Cowboys - You just know the owner of America's Team was once a card-carrying member of the KKK.
NBA:
Lakers - Yeah, ugh, Kobe raped somebody.
College football:
Notre Dame - Who's on your side now, bitch?
Alabama - Really it's just Nick Saban people hate. He's a cunt.
College basketball:
Duke - A few reasons: Laettner. Hurley. Battier. Redick. Coach K.
North Carolina - Powder blue is a fucking girl's color.
All right, folks. Spew your hate in the comments...
MLB -
ReplyDeleteCardinals - Stop the lovefest.
NFL -
Any team that plays in a dome, pussies.
NBA -
All of them.
College -
ND any team thats tight with the WWL can't be liked
The Celtics. Terrible fans, Bill Simmons, and their new all star team.
ReplyDeleteEagles - Philly fans suck and McNabb hates whitey.
Giants - Eli Manning and Tiki Barber.
No mention of Notre Dame? Screw USC too.
ReplyDeleteI only hate 1 team
ReplyDeletethe OHIO STATE UNIVERSITY
Broncos/Syracuse/Gators and their ilk- Can we permanently do away with the orange/blue color scheme?
ReplyDeleteUtah Jazz- Utah is the least jazzy place I've ever seen.
Phoenix anything- The fans suck, and hockey in Phoenix is like Danny DeVito in bed with a supermodel.
I HATE Notre Dame and everyone else should too. Here are some reasons:
ReplyDeleteCharlie Weis is FAT.
They get the most undeserved hype in all of sports.
ESPN worships them for no reason.
Charlie Weis is FAT.
Jimmy Clausen is GAY.
They think they are sweet for staying independent, with their precious NBC. They wouldn't go .500 in the B10.
Their mascot is a leprechaun.
Did I mention Charlie Weis is FAT.
ND Sucks.
NHL: Montreal Canadiens. Because they have long been the New York Yankees of hockey and their fans are even bigger douchebags than their Yankees counterparts.
ReplyDeleteNBA: Celtics and Bulls. Since you've already listed the Lakers
College football: Ohio State. Hey, I'm a Michigan fan for good and ill. Besides it's Ohio State.
Somebody ought to make a website with this idea.
ReplyDeleteBTW, why are the Lakers on this list and not Boston. Screw the Celtics for the same reasons you hate the Sawks and Patriots, plus they are Catholic too. What more reason do you have to hate them?
Michigan...as an Ohio State fan I felt compelled to respond.
ReplyDeleteMuck Fichigan.
Plus, they think they're hot shit but they are 2-2 and have blown their best chance at a title already. Michigan may be one of the most perennially overrated teams this decade. Whenever they get ranked high in the preseason, they fall flat. Whenever they get ranked low, they achieve a lot and then blow it late (either to OSU or a bowl game).
CFB - Iowa Hawkeyes all the fans i know are just clueless d-bags
ReplyDeleteI'm a diehard Cubs fan, but I totally understand you guys fucking HATING us. The loveable losers thing was just cooked up to get us through the depressing 90's.
ReplyDeleteCollege football:
ReplyDeleteU$C - fucking bandwagon/gangster wannabe fans, the arrogance runs like water in south central
MLB:
Dodgers (I'm a bigger A's fan than Giants, but still, who can cheer for the Dodgers), Red Sox, Yankees (you said it beautifully for both)
NFL:
Cowboys - as a Niners fan, I think I'm obligated to hate on em
Patriots - bandwagon fans, Bellicheat, etc.
Packers - as a Cal fan, I want to see Aaron Rodgers out there. The hate is pretty much reserved for Brett Favre. Retire already, old man.
NHL
No team hate, but I fucking hate Ed Belfour.
Anonymous 2:22: Apparently, you're an Islanders fan. Happy losing this season as the Rangers go to the Stanley Cup finals.
ReplyDeleteNFL- Cowboys- the owner has had more plastic surgery than Carmen Electra
ReplyDeleteMLB- Red Sox- here's to another 90 years of 2nd place. Chowdah-heads
NHL- Devils- they have fans? Or just people who couldn't get Rangers, Islanders or Flyers tickets?
Basketball- every team, worst sport ever.
i think the red sox need to be taken off the list because they are still the anti-yankees, no matter how much they have become to resemble the yankees, and we all know the yankees are the worst thing to ever happen to sports
ReplyDeleteGO BUY ANOTHER RING YOU ASSHOLES
actually sevenmack, I'm a Flyer fan. We won't win the cup this year, but we will be much improved
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