Jessica Alba and fuck-machine Cash Warren were at last night's Warriors/Jazz playoff game. Here's how a conversation went...
Cash$: Hey baby, whaddya say we get outta here...
Al(ba)4u: There's 8:46 left in the first quarter.
Cash$: But Baron's not even playin' well.
Al(ba)4u: So?
Cash$: So, you know I only come to these games because we went to high school together.
Al(ba)4u: Tell me again sweetheart, what was Baron like in high school?
Cash$: He was cool, but I was the ladies man.
Al(ba)4u: And you still are.
(They brush noses romantically)
Cash$: So let's go home and do it.
Al(ba)4u: But we already did it once today.
Cash$: It doesn't count when it's in the butt.
Al(ba)4u: Jerk.
Cash$: Oh c'mon baby, you know I try to do you any chance I get.
Al(ba)4u: I know, honey.
Cash$: Look at me, Jess. Look at this fucking sweater I'm wearing. Do I look like a guy who sleeps with the hottest women in the world? I look like a guy who nails high school girls with low self-esteem.
Al(ba)4u: Give yourself some credit. You were great in Fantastic Four. You're practically a star.
Cash$: Practically. Ha! Semantics.
Al(ba)4u: Hey, the Warriors just took a six-point lead.
Cash$: What?
Al(ba)4u: The game. The Warriors are up by six?
Cash$: What game?
Al(ba)4u: The Golden State game, silly.
Cash$: Who you calling silly? Bitch. You like being called Bitch, bitch?
Al(ba)4u: Baby, we're at a basketball game. Remember?
Cash$: Baron's not even playin' well.
Al(ba)4u: It's still early.
Cash$: I still think we should get outta here, grab some sushi, hit up an oxygen bar and go home.
Al(ba)4u: What if I told you that if you stay until the end of the quarter, I'll bring home a cheerleader for us.
Cash$: Us?
Al(ba)4u: You heard me.
Cash$: I'll pull up the car.
Al(ba)4u: Good. I put in enough face time anyway.
Check out the wildly-funny site The Dugout for more dialogue between your favorite stars.
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ReplyDeleteWhy isn't she wearing a gold shirt?
ReplyDeleteShe's Jessica Alba. She could wear a burlap sack and people wouldn't care, they'd just be stoked that they saw Jessica Alba, and got to bask in her hotness.
ReplyDeletefixed, signal. sorry about that...
ReplyDeleteUmmm, is she black??? Not that there's anything wrong with that.
ReplyDeleteNo.
ReplyDeleteThat there is the luckiest guy on the face of the Earth
ReplyDeleteme like jessica. grrrgggghhh. make wife. ooga booga. slobber slobber.
ReplyDeleteLame post
ReplyDeleteAlba alone is reason enough for me to keep rooting for the Warriors...
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