BALCO Hunters hate cripples

How do you shoot a BALCO Hunter in the back? What if you miss?

Ever since the BALCO Hunters -- a blanket term for anti-doping organizations and employees -- emerged as a major player in American sporting some years ago, an athlete can't so much take a piss without some BALCO Hunter trying to bottle up the urine and test it for steroids, marijuana, or herpes.

Of course, with the Tour de France soap opera among other events, the BALCO Hunters have taken their act across seas. And now, the BALCO Hunters have it in for handicapped athletes too.

Wheelchair tennis player Meliha Karic was banned for two years after testing positive for a metabolite, the International Tennis Federation announced on Thursday.

We weren't aware that there was such a thing as wheelchair tennis, but that's pretty cool. And this is pretty weak. Karic, French, didn't even mean to break the rules. She took some illegal substance -- and frankly, what the fuck isn't illegal these days? -- with her regular medication, so this isn't a pre-medicated doping scheme or something.

Little does this little tennis minx know, but the joke's on the International Tennis Federation and the BALCO Hunters: she'll be walking in two years when she's again eligible. She just may not know that yet.

(Big ups to "kickers_suck" for that tip). And please head over to Steroid Nation which has a nice -- and much more informative -- take on this. And send a letter to the ITF...those bastards.

In other news: Carmelo Anthony will not appeal his suspension for running like a little bitch, and will sit out for 15 games.