Sunday, April 02, 2006

Hec Edmundson Pavilion renamed

The University of Washington announced yesterday that Hec Edmundson Pavilion will be renamed by next year at the earliest.

"Does anyone actually know who this 'Hec Edmundson' character is?" asked Athletic Director Todd Turner. "I sure as hell don't."

Turner said there is a strong possibility that the name of the building will be changed to "Nate Robinson Arena."

"Wow, that's fuckin' awesome!" said Robinson from his seat in Larry Brown's doghouse at the end of the woeful New York Knicks' bench. "About time they do away with that Hec Ed shit. I'll be remembered forever now!"

Robinson seemed a little confused that forever is actually a very, very long time.

Upon some real basic investigation (you know, like typing some shit into Google), it was discovered that Clarence "Hec" Edmundson was some famous basketball and track coach at the UW.

In his 27 years at the helm of the hoops team, he compiled a 488-195 record, making him the winningest coach in school history. Edmundson is also remembered for originating the fast-break style of play, which is probably linked to his 36 years as coach of the track team.

Edmundson seemed very upset over the decision to remove his name from the arena.

"This is a grave mistake," said Edmundson, coincidentally, from his grave.

Turner said there was some discussion about simply changing "Pavilion" to "Arena," but said that would be, "really, really stupid."

Other suggestions being considered for the new name of the arena are:

-"Rashad Anderson is a fucking stupid bitch arena"
-"Our coach is better than yours pavilion"
-"The Dawghouse"

-Adam Landres-Schnur

This article ran in the April Fools edition of the University of Washington's The Daily. Yes, we know that April Fools day was yesterday assholes, but frankly, we were not in the mood to come up with original material today...we'll be back with you tomorrow.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

C.S. Edmundson was a great half-mile runner for Seattle Athletic Club -- winning National AAU Championship in 1909 and representing USA in 800m run at the 1912 Olympic Games. He aided development of Seattle Olympic Club and Pacific Northwest AAU track meets until shortly before his death. He also directed many indoor track meets at Edmundson Pavillion.